That's me, a casual narcissist. I'm a pretty self-interested, self-centered, selfish guy. I really came face to face with this over the weekend as I spent time hanging out with friends and other people from Open Door's youth group. The goal of the weekend was to be evangelistic in the community. Well, I spent pretty much the entire weekend focused on my problems and my desires instead of trying to share the Love I claim to believe in. I mean, it didn't help that this past week has been draining in almost every way and I was extremely tired throughout the weekend, but it was my idolatrous heart that was at the center of the problem, not my circumstances. The past couple weeks have been defined by school, fatigue, emotional uncertainty, and a bunch of other crap I don't feel like talking about. In all this, God has remained faithful, even though I place idol after idol before me and call them all "god."
I'll close with some As Cities Burn lyrics...
Father, hide our hearts in you
lest we steal them back
and lay them at the feet of men.
I know now that glory has not a place
near my hands or any man
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