but I am not going just yet.
Not a whole lot going on in life as of this moment. I just typed up a little song/poem/musicless-ditty I'm calling Be My Muse and then I tried to play a tune to it on the guitar but since I don't know jack about guitar playing, that quickly ended and I went back to writing words (something I know a little better).
I get asked all the time what I want to do with my life or where I'm gonna go or what my interests/hobbies are. I think most people ask that last question because they fancy themselves as unofficial career counselors, so if I would just tell them how I like to build model airplanes or I really like business math they could tell me what to do with my life. For the record, I don't build model airplanes and I'm not a major proponent for business math. Honestly, I don't really have any hobbies. I mean, I kind of consider myself a movie buff (I would say cinephile but thanks to pedophiles, any words with the suffix -phile seems to draw negative connotations) and I also really enjoy almost all types of music, but that's pretty much it. I don't play any instruments, which is annoying because when I tell people that I like music, they always ask "Oh, what instruments do you play?" and I have to respond with something like "Oh, I don't really play anything, I just like listening to and finding new bands and styles of music to enjoy." I also don't really know anything about making movies. I think it'd be really cool to write a screenplay or something and while a couple ideas have bounced in my head from time to time, I don't foresee anything like that happening.
Lately, I've been thinking I might stay at Southeastern to get an English degree. I don't really have a desire to be a teacher but I'm a big fan of words and some forms of literature, so it seems to be the most enjoyable degree I could get from Southeastern. Fiscally speaking, staying at Southeastern would certainly be the wisest choice. I can go the next couple years with free tuition and if I were to become an RA, I would get free room & board so I could move out and live right on campus. I think that part would probably be good because since I live off campus, I've never really taken much time to connect with people who don't go to Open Door. I saw one girl who I've only recently began to get to know the other day and we were talking and she was asking if this was my first semester and I told her that I'd actually been taking classes here a couple years. I guess my lack of trying to develop friendships at Southeastern has begun to come to light.
I'm laying in bed and I really ought to brush my teeth and go to bed, but I'm listening to some of the new Thrice album and I want to get through the rest of the tracks before I shut down for the night. I'm meeting a friend for breakfast before church tomorrow, so I'll probably regret not going to bed sooner. Oh well.
Update on the girl sitch (Yes that's right, it's a naked mole rat!). Haven't really had any contact with Girl C lately. I saw her at a distance earlier this week but she was talking to people and I wimped out. Later I FB chatted her to ask why she wasn't there (feigning ignorance of her presence) with the hope that it would start up a conversation but she didn't respond and got off chat a bit later and never responded. This is why I hate Facebook. It makes it incredibly hard to decipher whether someone is ignoring you or just is ignorant. All the while the demons in my head keep telling me how she's not at all interested or else she would've at least acknowledged me. I just don't know. I'll probably see her tomorrow at church and though I doubt we'll talk since I'm a coward and she has no reason to talk to me, maybe something will happen. As far as I know she's still going to the Fleet Foxes show with me and two friends of ours and if that is confirmed tomorrow, I will probably spend Monday and Tuesday playing out scenarios in my head of where we'll all sit, if she'll like the concert, if we'll do anything before or after, what I'll say to her, and a multitude of other insignificant things that keep me up at night.
I would end this post with lyrics from the new Thrice record but it's hard to pick out specific lyrics because they're all just so tight and well-written, plus half the beauty is in the music and the singing.
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